Here are my top 5 laughs for this week!
My oldest son is a character. No, really, he is. He's about to turn 12 next week, and I was thinking back on funny things he has said and done, and would love to share a few memories with you. Some of them may be a little bit inappropriate....But since when do kids always say and do the most appropriate things?!
1. My son was about 4, and was in the tub taking a bath. I was in the room, straightening things up. Kyle said to me, "Mommy?" I replied, "Yes?" He then grabbed his family jewels and said "What are these things?" I was dumbfounded, but replied as appropriately as I could. "Kyle, those are your testicles." He got a very thoughtful look on his face and then said "Hey Mommy....I have lovely testicles..." Oh. My. Goodness. What do you even SAY to that?!
2. One year when my son was about 4, we were Trick-Or-Treating. He was the most adorable little dinosaur. Well, as we made our way from house to house, he was the epitome of good behavior. Until we reached a home where a little girl dressed as a witch was passing out candy...Then it all fell apart. You see, Grandma has let him watch the movie "Kindergarten Cop". As the little girl handed him his candy, he blurted out: "Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina." We were MORTIFIED, but the other parents seemed to find it amusing.
3. Potty Training. Gotta love it. Kyle was incredibly resistant, despite early efforts to teach him. He KNEW what to do, and would make his teddy bear do so on the potty, but HE wanted no part of it. So I bought the video, "Once Upon A Potty: For Him." This seemed to help. In the video, the little boy Joshua is being potty-trained. They go through an anatomy lesson that states: Joshua is a little boy. He has eyes to see, a mouth to eat and talk, etc....One day, when Kyle was 3, we were at the grocery store. There were 2 little old ladies who HAD to be in their 70's at least in the aisle with us. One lady started talking to me about a product or recipe, and Kyle was charming the other lady. Everything seemed perfectly fine...And then I heard my son say "And a little hole for making poo-poo." Horrified, I look over, and my toddler had his pants around his ankles, Pull-Ups down, and was spreading his cheeks for this very old woman...Thankfully, she thought it was funny. In fact, her grandkids had the same video, so she knew WHY he was saying this....Oh, the joys of parenthood!
4. This is a little more recent. Kyle is about 10 years older than our daughter, Sophie. I buy the toddlers specific organic juices that are made for babies. One day, Kyle asked if he could have some. I told him no, but that he could have the other juice, since it wasn't only made for babies. He then asked " Oh, so this juice is okay for REAL humans, too?"
5. I will finish up with a photo. This says it all! Yes, my son is a character!