The really amazing part? He didn't HAVE to love me....You see, biologically, I am not his child. My own "father", and we will use that term loosely, was not present. My DAD stepped in when I was a mere infant. Not "his" child. But he loved me anyway...Raised me anyway...I was HIS daughter. I still am.
Was my childhood perfect? No. It was actually a bit of a nightmare. My parents made mistakes...Now that I am a parent, too, I can understand and forgive that....I married way too young to a man who abused me....It's okay...My current husband treats me like gold, and I have 3 amazing kids who will NEVER have to deal with the things that I did....Never. I am breaking the cycle of addiction. Period. I am happy. My kids are happy. And I will make DAMN sure they always will be.
The fact is, my life has not been easy...I am not close to my mother. For awhile, I wasn't close to my Dad, either. I have never really felt loved, nor have I felt that I really even had parents. This was hard. This caused me to make awful decisions in my youth that impacted the remainder of my life.
I thank God every day that I made the decision to move back "home" to Ohio. This reminded me of what family really is. I am ashamed to say this, but I didn't speak to my Dad for almost 20 years. (I know...We all screw up, and my mind was somewhat poisoned as a kid. I am trying to make up for that now.)
I have something very special...Amazing...Wonderful...Unbelievable to share.
You see, my Dad is in a band. (Like I said....) Tonight, we went to see them play. We do this whenever they're local enough to do so. There is a particular song..."Perfect" by Pink...I have always related to this song. The video especially. This song IS my life.
Tonight...Tonight...My Dad publicly dedicated it to ME. He told me loved me....That he's proud of me...Not to listen to the "voices". He did this during a show, and it meant EVERYTHING to me. FOr the first time ever, I felt loved...validated...special...from a parent. I hugged him. I cried. I danced. I sang along. And then I had to leave, since the tears wouldn't stop....
I love you, Dad. THANK YOU. Thank you for being the Dad you didn't HAVE to be. Thank you for caring. For loving your grandkids. For everything. I am touched...I am humbled...And I am grateful. I finally have parents. I love you, Dad and Missy, the best step-mom ever!
Happy Father's Day to everyone. Please tell your dads how much you love them! I know I love mine!!!