I recently got the opportunity to watch the brand new movie, Mighty Fine, starring Andie MacDowell and Chazz Palminteri, one of my favorite actors, by the way. I convinced myself that despite this movie's sensitive subject matter, I would be able to maintain composure. I told myself that no matter what I saw, I wouldn't allow my emotions get the best of me. I couldn't have been more wrong. This movie was powerful, moving, and incredibly hard to watch, especially for a survivor of domestic violence.
I began watching this movie, perfectly fine. Sure, there were some red flag moments. I legitimately felt for the wife and daughters in this film, which portrays the classic, emotionally and physically abusive household. I felt bad when they got belittled and yelled at...I wept for them when it turned physical in nature. It brought back painful memories of my first marriage. The ONLY good thing to come out of that relationship, if you can call it that, was my son. He is the ONLY "good and pure" thing my ex-husband has ever done. My ex was physically, mentally, emotionally, and even sexually abusive towards me. It was this way for YEARS, and he always tried to blame ME for his sick, sadistic behavior. I will not go into detail here, but it was BAD. The best thing I have ever done, for me or my son, was to find the courage to leave.
My biggest problem watching Mighty Fine? To be completely honest, it's that I wasn't MORE disturbed. The movie depicted the father as a "monster" with severe mental illness...He treated his wife and children like second class citizens...Yet the whole time I was watching, all I could think was "This is nothing compared to what I have been through."
And that's the God's honest truth...My ex-husband makes this character look like Mickey Mouse in comparison. Yes, that is a bold statement to make, but it's 100% true. What I had to endure in my first marriage was exponentially worse than anything depicted in this film, and that made me sad. I will not go into detail here, as I am still, to this day, horribly afraid of the man who oppressed me for many years. But let's just say that being told you're worthless and ugly every single day, and being threatened that your eyes would be gouged out with a spoon and your body concealed by being fed to a wood chipper is not a pleasant experience, to say the least!
The film was made to bring the very real issue of emotional abuse to the table, and because of the Hell I have gone through, I was almost desensitized to it. This made me sad, since I knew in my rational mind that what the movie showed was more than most people would ever have to endure in a lifetime. I, however, have dealt with far worse. Like 100x worse!
Here is a brief trailer of this must see movie:
This is something I have personally endured. It was like living a nightmare, every single day. I couldn't breathe...I couldn't think...I couldn't be myself. I couldn't have my own opinions, I couldn't argue his views, no matter how distorted, and I was always told that there was something wrong with ME, and I "made" him treat me the way he did. I hated myself. I had no friends, and I was alienated from my family. Because of what HE said I "should" do.
I now know this was beyond wrong. I now now my own value as a human being. I am kind, loving, and have a lot to offer, despite what my abuser said for so many years. I have now been married for 4 years to a man who loves me. He values me. He allows me to be myself, flaws and all. And I am always "good enough." I still have my "bad days". I still hear my ex's voice in my head, putting me down. I struggle to this day. But leaving...getting my son out of that toxic environment was the single best thing I have ever done. The hardest thing, perhaps, but the best. He has the opportunity to be a decent man. A good man. A loving and empathetic man. He would have never had that chance had I stayed in my previous marriage, and I know it. I thank God every single day that I got out alive with my sanity intact.
I would definitely recommend the film, Mighty Fine, to anyone who wants to learn more about the commonly hidden world of emotional abuse. This movie is raw, honest, and to the point. It doesn't sugar-coat anything. My only wish? That my own experiences weren't so much worse than the depictions in the movie. It brought to light how sadistic and truly abnormal my own experience has been, and that left me in tears. Emotional abuse is an issue that NEEDS to be addressed, and Mighty Fine is a great start and a wonderful ice-breaker.
Mighty Fine opens in theaters on May 25, 2012. Click HERE to find a showing near you.
You can learn more about Mighty Fine on their website.
***Disclosure:I participated in a campaign on behalf of Mom Central Consulting for Mighty Fine and the distributor. I received access to an online showing of the film and a promotional item to thank me for participating.***